Dear Diary!!!!
I don't know what I'm going to do. I have 23 minutes left before something awful happens to me. Let me explain:
22 minutes ago I received an email from someone. I opened it up and it had a bunch of stories about people who sent the email on and were immediately rewarded. BUT then I saw that there were stories about people who didn't send the email on, and they suffered for it. Ok, but the big problem is this: I sent this email to everyone I know, but I still need to send it to five more, or I will be severely punished. What should I do? I'm so scared...I feel like that poor girl in the blair witch movie with the noseboogies. That's how scared I am. Oh NO! Now I'm down to 15 minutes.
14 minutes...
I think I'm going to search the net for random email addresses. Does that count? I hope so.
Ok, well, I'd better start-there isn't much time left. If this doesn't work out, I'm sorry diary, but I'll be under my bed until whatever happens happens.
It's been really great!
CyberBeliever
Wednesday, November 30, 2005
Every night it's the same thing
Ok, so no fiction this time.
Every single night, i do the same thing to myself. i stay up way too late either actually doing work, or what's more likely, doing everything but. either way, the next day i'm exhausted and fantasizing about napping. that's pretty pathetic, i think. i feel like i'm either a really old lady or a five year old. i seriously need a nap time just to make it through. vicious cycle, i know, but i can't help myself. and it's not even finals time yet, which is when it gets really bad.
one positive note: i have essentially finished my christmas shopping, which is the one thing in my life i can lord over everyone. ( the real reason i can drive people nuts is that i've been done since early november)
ok, so, i accept all forms of pity for being completely, insanely immature and stupid in my sleeping habits. feel free to commiserate.
Every single night, i do the same thing to myself. i stay up way too late either actually doing work, or what's more likely, doing everything but. either way, the next day i'm exhausted and fantasizing about napping. that's pretty pathetic, i think. i feel like i'm either a really old lady or a five year old. i seriously need a nap time just to make it through. vicious cycle, i know, but i can't help myself. and it's not even finals time yet, which is when it gets really bad.
one positive note: i have essentially finished my christmas shopping, which is the one thing in my life i can lord over everyone. ( the real reason i can drive people nuts is that i've been done since early november)
ok, so, i accept all forms of pity for being completely, insanely immature and stupid in my sleeping habits. feel free to commiserate.
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Waaaahhhh!
Dear Diary,
What's happening with the universe? When I looked out my window this morning, the sky was black as the minister's veil. Impenetrable. I was deeply disturbed by this apparent wrinkle in reality, but I had no idea of the extent to which time and space has been altered.
I should have been warned by the fact that I did not awake when my alarm clock sounded this morning. This has never happened to me before, but I managed to sleep through it for quite some time. The beep, beep, beep was a distant irritant to my unconscious and oneiric state. I was lost in a world of vague and disproportionate shapes and dark movements. I could easily have been somewhere on the dark side of the moon. This first indicator that something was wrong more or less escaped me due to the fact that I was not aware of anything, much less shifts in reality.
Next, I stumbled out of bed and banged my leg on either my bed or my desk. This led me to erupt in a flood of expletives, but it also shocked me. My room is far too large for a stumble to have caused me to bruise myself, yet suddenly, I could barely fit between the desk and the bed. I considered the possibility that I had journeyed to the kitchen in a dreamy stupor, eating everything available and changing my own physical form, but my pants still fit, so it couldn't be. I can't explain these phenomena, but I will say this: something is not right, something is quite wrong. My intention is to go back to sleep and hopefully awake in the right dimension. I would write more about the strange happenings, but I fear the computer will talk back to me or something of that nature...it's been an unfathomable day.
Confused and Distraught,
Bizarro-Me
What's happening with the universe? When I looked out my window this morning, the sky was black as the minister's veil. Impenetrable. I was deeply disturbed by this apparent wrinkle in reality, but I had no idea of the extent to which time and space has been altered.
I should have been warned by the fact that I did not awake when my alarm clock sounded this morning. This has never happened to me before, but I managed to sleep through it for quite some time. The beep, beep, beep was a distant irritant to my unconscious and oneiric state. I was lost in a world of vague and disproportionate shapes and dark movements. I could easily have been somewhere on the dark side of the moon. This first indicator that something was wrong more or less escaped me due to the fact that I was not aware of anything, much less shifts in reality.
Next, I stumbled out of bed and banged my leg on either my bed or my desk. This led me to erupt in a flood of expletives, but it also shocked me. My room is far too large for a stumble to have caused me to bruise myself, yet suddenly, I could barely fit between the desk and the bed. I considered the possibility that I had journeyed to the kitchen in a dreamy stupor, eating everything available and changing my own physical form, but my pants still fit, so it couldn't be. I can't explain these phenomena, but I will say this: something is not right, something is quite wrong. My intention is to go back to sleep and hopefully awake in the right dimension. I would write more about the strange happenings, but I fear the computer will talk back to me or something of that nature...it's been an unfathomable day.
Confused and Distraught,
Bizarro-Me
Same Difference?
Random question for the nonexistent readers of this blog!
My sister recently asked me about the meaning of this saying...(see title) It's not that we don't understand it, but that it's annoyingly contradictory.
Also, I always hated the Wallflower song with these lyrics:
"The only difference
That I see
Is you are exactly the same
as you used to be..."
Clever or annoying?
What do you think? Any other annoying phrases you want to mention?
My sister recently asked me about the meaning of this saying...(see title) It's not that we don't understand it, but that it's annoyingly contradictory.
Also, I always hated the Wallflower song with these lyrics:
"The only difference
That I see
Is you are exactly the same
as you used to be..."
Clever or annoying?
What do you think? Any other annoying phrases you want to mention?
BRAND NEW INFORMATION
Dear Diary,
Ok, so this is strange. Please do not think I am disgusting. I can't believe this myself, but here it is:
I discovered that most of the people I know pee in the shower when they're in there and they have to go. I was told:
there's no point in wasting water by flushing a toilet/i aim for the drain/what? am i gonna get OUT of the shower to go?/ the water's all going to the same place anyway/ i'm cleaning myself off...
and the list goes on!
So there you have it. Everyone I know does this but me. Pretty strange and deeply disturbing.
Sincerely,
Least Disgusting Person I Know
Ok, so this is strange. Please do not think I am disgusting. I can't believe this myself, but here it is:
I discovered that most of the people I know pee in the shower when they're in there and they have to go. I was told:
there's no point in wasting water by flushing a toilet/i aim for the drain/what? am i gonna get OUT of the shower to go?/ the water's all going to the same place anyway/ i'm cleaning myself off...
and the list goes on!
So there you have it. Everyone I know does this but me. Pretty strange and deeply disturbing.
Sincerely,
Least Disgusting Person I Know
An interesting difference
Dear Diary,
I found out today that some women wear bras to decrease the size of their breasts. Who knew? I always thought that any woman would want to lift 'em up and stick 'em out (provided she's not working out or playing sports). But then my busty friend informed me that it isn't so. Not a push-up but a press-down (don't remember the actual name). I cannot imagine this.
I have been pretty pathetic in the boobular department for most of my life, so it never occured to me that these bras exist. At least not for sizes under 40DDD or something similar. Weird!
Pensively yours,
Braless Wonder or WonderBra
I found out today that some women wear bras to decrease the size of their breasts. Who knew? I always thought that any woman would want to lift 'em up and stick 'em out (provided she's not working out or playing sports). But then my busty friend informed me that it isn't so. Not a push-up but a press-down (don't remember the actual name). I cannot imagine this.
I have been pretty pathetic in the boobular department for most of my life, so it never occured to me that these bras exist. At least not for sizes under 40DDD or something similar. Weird!
Pensively yours,
Braless Wonder or WonderBra
The point of this blog
I really have three reasons for creating this blog...or maybe four.
1- I need a place to release my creative energy
2-I think I may be suffering from blog envy
3-I need something new to distract me from writing papers and general responsibilities: which should PROBABLY be number 1...
4-Eddie told me to.
So, this is all a bunch of fiction from my twisted head, sprinkled with some recognizable reality for those who know me.
Please don't hate the talentless...
1- I need a place to release my creative energy
2-I think I may be suffering from blog envy
3-I need something new to distract me from writing papers and general responsibilities: which should PROBABLY be number 1...
4-Eddie told me to.
So, this is all a bunch of fiction from my twisted head, sprinkled with some recognizable reality for those who know me.
Please don't hate the talentless...
i will not be the smelly kid in class
dear diary,
today, in class, i smelled something kind of gross. i'm not sure if it was me, but if it was, i don't know what i'll do. it smelled like mcdonald's food--but definitely not in a good way.
you know, it's not like i don't wear anti-perspirant. but if i smell anyway, what am i supposed to do? i shower and all, so it can't be a matter of cleanliness..maybe it wasn't me...but that seems kind of unlikely. i wonder if other people noticed and avoided me because of it? oh my god...i don't know what i'll do if i'm the smelly kid in class. you always hear about the stinkerpot, but i don't want to be that person.
i can't believe this. i knew my sister wasn't lying when she said i smell bad. my mom said she was just trying to get to me, but i knew her nose was telling the truth. what if i smell like onions? people do not like smelling onions in your armpit. i can never hug someone again, that's for sure!
kiss on the cheek, but no arm lifting motion--
smellykidinbackrow
today, in class, i smelled something kind of gross. i'm not sure if it was me, but if it was, i don't know what i'll do. it smelled like mcdonald's food--but definitely not in a good way.
you know, it's not like i don't wear anti-perspirant. but if i smell anyway, what am i supposed to do? i shower and all, so it can't be a matter of cleanliness..maybe it wasn't me...but that seems kind of unlikely. i wonder if other people noticed and avoided me because of it? oh my god...i don't know what i'll do if i'm the smelly kid in class. you always hear about the stinkerpot, but i don't want to be that person.
i can't believe this. i knew my sister wasn't lying when she said i smell bad. my mom said she was just trying to get to me, but i knew her nose was telling the truth. what if i smell like onions? people do not like smelling onions in your armpit. i can never hug someone again, that's for sure!
kiss on the cheek, but no arm lifting motion--
smellykidinbackrow
What to do...
Dear Diary,
I can't decide! What should I watch tonight? I'm struggling because I don't have enough VCRs to tape all of my shows. I thought three would be enough, but every channel has something worthwhile. It's really a problem. Why can't they make a VCR or something that tapes multiple shows at one time? I thought of investing in some kind of contraption to record things digitally. But then I realized that I don't have the time: when would I program it? It would interfere with my viewing pleasure. Oh no.
I hear that a lot of new shows are on that are worthwhile. All of the sites online are raving about them. I don't know how to sqeeze it all in. Oh man, oh man.
Ok, so now I realized that while writing I completely missed the beginning of the eight o'clock hour.
Better Go---
TVFAN79-05
I can't decide! What should I watch tonight? I'm struggling because I don't have enough VCRs to tape all of my shows. I thought three would be enough, but every channel has something worthwhile. It's really a problem. Why can't they make a VCR or something that tapes multiple shows at one time? I thought of investing in some kind of contraption to record things digitally. But then I realized that I don't have the time: when would I program it? It would interfere with my viewing pleasure. Oh no.
I hear that a lot of new shows are on that are worthwhile. All of the sites online are raving about them. I don't know how to sqeeze it all in. Oh man, oh man.
Ok, so now I realized that while writing I completely missed the beginning of the eight o'clock hour.
Better Go---
TVFAN79-05
This one's for EG
Dear Diary,
Woof! It was much worse than I expected. First of all, someone farted in the stairway. I mean, they really let one go. I could barely breathe all the way to the top floor, which is horrible, given the climb. Ok, but moving on...
Next, someone in class had the same shoes on as me. More importantly, she was wearing them with a skirt!! Hello-it's, like, 20 degrees out! Who needs to wear a skirt? I think they might have looked better on her if she didn't have those huge feet. They looked like two overinflated rescue boats. Maybe she shouldn't have bought them in neon yellow. The worst part is, she ruined the shoes for me. I think I'm gonna throw them away because they disgust me now.
Oh yeah and can you believe that "someone" thought it would be cool to give my number to Kevin? He keeps calling me: like I'm interested...what is he thinking? Meanwhile, I had a horrible hair day and he actually complimented me on it. Um, excuse me, but I DO NOT need someone to lie to me. I have my friends for that.
Ok, well, I guess I should get back to working on my thesis for my PhD program.
xoxo,
2cool4school
Woof! It was much worse than I expected. First of all, someone farted in the stairway. I mean, they really let one go. I could barely breathe all the way to the top floor, which is horrible, given the climb. Ok, but moving on...
Next, someone in class had the same shoes on as me. More importantly, she was wearing them with a skirt!! Hello-it's, like, 20 degrees out! Who needs to wear a skirt? I think they might have looked better on her if she didn't have those huge feet. They looked like two overinflated rescue boats. Maybe she shouldn't have bought them in neon yellow. The worst part is, she ruined the shoes for me. I think I'm gonna throw them away because they disgust me now.
Oh yeah and can you believe that "someone" thought it would be cool to give my number to Kevin? He keeps calling me: like I'm interested...what is he thinking? Meanwhile, I had a horrible hair day and he actually complimented me on it. Um, excuse me, but I DO NOT need someone to lie to me. I have my friends for that.
Ok, well, I guess I should get back to working on my thesis for my PhD program.
xoxo,
2cool4school
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